05/28/2026
Doing it the way my parents did it didn't work.
When I got married I figured that my financial life would be handled the same way my parents handled theirs. Pop went to work, brought Ma his paycheque every two weeks, she gave him gas and beer money, and she took care of the rest.
Sounds pretty simple, right?
It worked for them so it should work for me, right?
Nope.
It seems my wife worked on the assumption that if there was money in the chequing account it meant she could spend it. I didn't realize she had this type of thinking until I started getting phone calls from creditors wondering when they could expect to be paid. This happened entirely by accident because one day I happened to be standing closer to the phone than she was when a creditor called.
I had no financial literacy at that point, but I knew that getting phone calls from creditors demanding payment was bad.
I asked my wife what else she was hiding. After uncovering the whole mess I took over the finances.
My plan? Work my arse off, make a payment plan with each creditor, put our spending on lockdown, return anything we had purchased that we didn't need and could get refunded. I held the purse strings, and she was the one getting gas and beer money.
I worked 60 hours a week. 1 full-time job, 2 part time. She worked full time. All minimum wage. I made arrangements with each creditor to ensure we had a payment plan we could stick to and that satisfied them. I ruled with an iron fist. Wife didn't like it and the marriage eventually ended because of it.
The key takeaways?
+ Married folks, monitor your accounts jointly. This will expose any issue quickly. The two of you need to be on the same page financially.
+ Have a conversation about your money styles before getting married. 68% of couples cite financial issues as a leading source of conflict, and about 25% of couples cite money problems as a primary factor in their divorce.
+ Neither your employer, nor your government, nor your family, nor your bank are going to get you to a comfortable retirement. That's on you. What worked for your parents may not work for you. Learn not only what they did, but why.
+ WYAO (Work Your Arse Off) and giving every dollar a job was the way out for me.