07/16/2026
Last work happy hour, I was mid-conversation.
Someone was talking about nothing important. Genuinely nothing. I couldn't tell you what.
I said, "Be right back," and went to the bathroom.
I did not come back.
I got in my car instead.
Drove home.
Didn't tell anyone I was leaving.
As far as that conversation is concerned, I'm still in the bathroom.
Monday, I saw that same coworker in the break room.
They said hi.
Completely normal.
No idea I'd ever left.
That's the part that gets me.
I didn't storm out.
Nothing happened.
I just wasn't there anymore, and the world kept going exactly the same without me in it.
My friends would call BS if I told them this.
They've never seen the bathroom exit.
They've only ever met the version of me that's still at the party.
Ask an hour after I get somewhere where I am, and the honest answer is:
No idea.
I'm already home.