Allison V. Bishop, CPA - Financial Coach

07/20/2025

It's been a minute, but a new blog is up on my website - it's all about the weight of inherited money. The full text is below, but you can read my other blogs at https://allisonbishop.com/blog

Inheriting money usually comes with baggage. Only rarely do we inherit money from people who we didn’t know; most of the time we knew and often loved the person who passed away. This means that we often imbue the inheritance with much more weight than any other money we have. Getting a $10,000 bonus will feel very different to many people than inheriting $10,000 from a recently deceased parent.

I find that a lot of people feel a sense of responsibility when they inherit money. I really like that – I always appreciate it when people are intentional with their money, and a sense that they need to be a good steward brings with it a lot of thought to how they’re going to spend it.

A few weeks ago I was in a meeting with a client and she shared with me a story of how she inherited a small amount of money from her grandfather. She was young and poor, and was going to use it on rent or other bills, but her mother stopped her. She told her to spend it on something special. So my client went out and bought a bicycle with it. She told me that she thought of her grandfather almost every time she used that bike. We were both crying by the end of this conversation, and it’s stuck with me as a perfect example of the meaning of inherited money.

Talking about inherited money is always a careful conversation for me. If I sense that the person is overwhelmed with the amount of money, still grieving, or carrying some guilt about being handed money that they feel they don’t deserve, I navigate very carefully.

This sense of responsibility to honor the decedent can sometimes be too much. I had a client who wouldn’t use her inheritance to pay off her credit card debt because her dad didn’t know she had the debt. I’m pretty sure he would have been happy to have her get out from under that debt, but she wouldn’t do it.

Sometimes people are willing to use the money in certain ways (saving for retirement or college but not travel or debt) and so I try to work that preference into the plan. For example, if they won’t use the inheritance towards debt, I’ll suggest that they use the required distributions from an inherited IRA to put directly into a Roth IRA for themselves, and then have them use the money that they were using for retirement to pay down their debt faster.

Sometimes the person doesn’t want to spend any of it. I definitely understand wanting to set aside a new inheritance to give yourself time to think about what you really want to do with it, but sometimes it’s more than that. They insist they have to save it all to leave to their own children. That’s entirely their choice, but just passing down a growing pile of money from one generation to the next doesn’t actually help anyone at all. If you want to leave it to your own children, do you want them saying that they’re never going to use it, and instead leave it to the next generation and the next? I don’t think that’s what you’re hoping will happen, so why do you feel the need to do so?

Recently I’ve been reading about a new trend: some wealthy aging parents give away their money during their lifetimes rather than all upon their deaths. My sense is that this idea has become popular through the book Die With Zero by Bill Perkins. These lifetime gifts often mean that they can enjoy watching their children use it, or perhaps it’s during a particularly tight time in their children’s lives, such as when they have their own young children in daycare.

I can understand why this is appealing to many people, as they can watch their loved ones use the money to make their lives better or to provide opportunities that they otherwise wouldn’t have. It also takes away to some extent the weight of the money upon your death – I don’t see the same ethical struggles when people receive a gift from a living person.

Of course, many people in their retirement years don’t have a large enough nest egg to be confident about giving away large amounts of money without worrying about their own financial stability – this is more for people who don’t have to worry about outliving their money.

Many of us will inherit money at some point over our lives, and my hope is that we take it seriously and use it intentionally, but not ascribe so much meaning and weight to it that we create false narratives of how we must use it.

Photo by Andriyko Podilnyk on Unsplash

02/26/2025

Thanks to NEWS CENTER Maine for allowing me to share my thoughts on how to handle high grocery prices in Maine:

Experts share tips on meal planning, bulk buying, and minimizing waste.

02/06/2025

Last month I posted two blogs about teenagers and money. It reminded me that I had written a similar article for a local wellness magazine seven years ago. My children were aged seven through twelve at the time. The original article is below, but you can read the other blogs at my website at https://allisonbishop.com/blog

The one sentence I hear most often from my clients is: “My parents never talked to me about money.” Our society isn’t comfortable talking about money in anything but the vaguest terms: the most specific someone might get is to say that something is “very expensive” or they “got a really good deal.”

The trouble with this is that our kids learn so much about the world through seeing how we handle things. We actively teach them important life lessons - how to eat healthy, that we should be kind and respectful of other people, that exercising our bodies is important – through the things we say and do. We don’t do this with money nearly as well.

Money is an important part of every adult’s life. It’s the main reason most of us go to work every day, and we have to make financial decisions all the time. If our kids are going to grow up to be functional adults, they need a healthy relationship with money. We’re not doing them any favors by hiding money behind closed doors or treating it as a shameful secret.

Generally, the most financially literate adults are the ones whose parents taught them financial lessons growing up, whether explicitly or not. I don’t recall my parents ever giving me specific advice about how to handle money, but I could see that they were always very careful about their spending. I remember my dad sitting at the kitchen table with a pile of receipts and the handwritten ledger sheet where he recorded their spending every month. People who grow up in a different kind of household - one where money went out the door as soon as it came in, or where debt was a constant source of stress - are shaped by that as well. Many times they adopt the same habits as their parents; although some of them make a very intentional decision to live a different lifestyle. It’s hard to break out of that cycle, though, when you haven’t seen healthy money habits demonstrated. Maybe they don’t want to be constantly in debt as their parents were, but they also weren’t given the tools to take a different path.

My husband and I talk about money all the time with our own four children. We don’t say “we can’t afford that” when we make a decision against spending money; rather we say “we’re choosing not to spend our money on that.” It’s much more reflective of the reality that we’re making a conscious and purposeful choice rather than being controlled by how much money happens to be in our wallet.

We talk with our kids about the big things: they understand that we pay money to live in our house and that we’ll eventually own it and not have to pay anymore. They know that college is very expensive and that we’re already saving our money for it. When the college search actually begins in a few years, they will be active participants in picking a college that not only works for them socially and academically, but is also affordable for our family. If they have to take out student loans, they will understand ahead of time what that will mean for them after graduation.

We also talk about everyday financial decisions. If they go to the grocery store with me they hear me talk about why I decided on one brand versus another, or when I’m willing to pay a little bit more for wild fish instead of farm-raised. They know I buy seltzer in cans instead of bottles because it’s cheaper per ounce, but I can’t even consider buying the cheaper, off-brand English muffins, or I get a lot of complaints.

I remember the first time my oldest brought home a book order form from school. He had circled everything he wanted – which pretty much meant that more items were circled than not. I got the calculator and we added up how much it would cost to purchase everything he wanted. It added up to over $200. He didn’t understand exactly how much money that was, but it sounded like a lot to his kindergarten brain. I had him go back through and take out some items he didn’t really want as badly, or books we knew we could borrow for free from the library. When he came back to me, we added it up again: $80. It took three or four passes before he got it down to under $20. I never intended that book order to be an active lesson in financial literacy, but it turned out to be a pretty good way to teach him about making choices. Now when he brings home a book order, he has two or three items circled, and he knows exactly how much they add up to before he gives me the form. The real value of this lesson is not that I’ve saved a few hundred dollars a year, or that I don’t have to fight with him about things he doesn’t really need, but that he’s aware that we think about the choices we make around money and we use our money to buy things that will make our lives better in some way.

I find that gift cards are great tools to teach decision making about money. Once a year a generous friend of the family sends Target gift cards to my kids. This is a serious event for our family and one we set aside an entire afternoon for. I encourage them to think ahead of time about what they want to buy, and to consider items other than toys: sporting equipment or clothes or decorations for their rooms. They all approach our shopping trip very differently; two of them spend every dollar on the card, while the other two only buy a couple of things they want and save the rest. Three of them spend a lot of time weighing the available options, while the other one just grabs everything she sees that looks good. They can bring their own money to supplement the gift card, but they know I won’t be giving money to them if they go over.

Talking easily and openly about money at home is giving your children a gift. Keep it age appropriate. You don’t have to tell them exactly how much you make, and don’t share with them anything that might cause them stress, like knowing you’re carrying around a lot of debt or that you’re not sure whether you can afford to fill up the gas tank, but consider starting conversations about those little, every-day decisions about money and why you’re making the choices you are. If you’ve made a smart money choice, tell them about it, and if you’ve made mistakes in the past, share those too. You don’t have to be a financial genius to have learned some smart lessons over the years. Let your children learn from your mistakes so that hopefully they won’t repeat them. Our kids don’t have a lot of ways to learn about money, so engaging them in active conversations about money choices will allow you to shape the lessons they’re learning and make sure they’re taking away the right messages. It also keeps the door open for communication around money topics as they get older. I remember one smart piece of parenting advice I learned as a young mom: if you listen to the small things now, they’ll come to you with the big things later.

[Photo courtesy of Vecteezy.com]

12/12/2024

I said a couple of weeks ago that I'd post a blog about the financial lessons learned while car shopping with my college-aged son. Full text is below, and my other blogs are at my website: https://allisonbishop.com/blog

My fifteen-year old minivan bit the dust over the summer, so I reluctantly pulled out the vehicle research I’d done over the past few months (this was not an entirely unexpected event) and became a car shopper. I took advantage of the fact that my son was home from college after his freshman year; I brought him along with me to the car dealership to help me test drive and for company. It turned into a very useful real-world financial literacy lesson.

We found a vehicle that we both liked, wasn’t too expensive, and had low mileage. I had forgotten how many hours it takes to buy a vehicle from a dealership. All that waiting time together gave us an opportunity to talk through all the trickery I was subjected to once I’d agreed to buy the car and the finance talk started:

SPEED: The volume of the pile of documents that was put in front of me, and the speed with which the finance guy flipped through them, was overwhelming.

UPSELL: Despite telling me during the selling process how amazing the 7-year powertrain warranty was, during the money talk, suddenly that warranty was downplayed and I was pushed hard to buy the extended warranty. I was warned that it was only available that day and I could never buy it again. I did not buy it. I have never regretted not buying an extended warranty.

“MISTAKES”: I asked the salesman to remove a few items I didn’t need or want to pay for, so he crossed them out. When he brought a new document 30 minutes later, all of those items were still on there as part of the price. I played along that it was an honest mistake and asked him to remove them again.

MONTHLY PAYMENTS: This is the one that kills me, and I absolutely warned my son ahead of time: they only talked in monthly payments. Sure, I saw the price of the car, but every number was quoted as a monthly payment amount (and he was using a 72-month loan, so it all sounded like really low numbers). When I pushed back on the interest rates, and suggested I could get a better one from my bank, he dismissed that, saying that a rate that was 1% higher would only increase the payment by a dollar or so per month (actually, it would have been $18/month, or over $1,300 if I had agreed to a 72-month loan).

UPSELL #2: I had put down only a small down payment, so I was going into the loan a little bit upside down (meaning that I owed more than the car was worth at the beginning of the loan). The finance guy pushed VERY hard for me to buy gap coverage. Gap coverage is insurance that provides coverage in the case that the consumer totals the car but the insurance company won’t pay enough to pay off the loan; it pays the remainder of the loan back so you’re not stuck with a loan balance for a car you no longer own. I did not worry about this – I could have put down more, but the loan very quickly will be paid down to where I’m not upside down anymore. The finance guy acted shocked, and told me that almost everyone buys it, and that insurance companies are quick to total cars these days, and what would I do if that happened? I told him that it would be extremely unlikely that I would total this car, and that I have savings to cover the difference. He emphasized how “cheap” the $36/month cost was, but didn’t mention that that fee would last the entire length of the loan, far beyond when I’ve built plenty of equity in the car. That’s over $2,000 I’d have paid for something that will almost certainly not occur. The takeaway is the harder they push, the more likely it’s something you’d be overpaying for, and that they likely are personally profiting from.

This kind of real-world experience is invaluable in preparing our young adults to navigate their own financial situations. It’s possible my husband or I might be right next to my son when he purchases his first car, but it’s equally possible he’ll be living in a different state and he’ll have to handle it entirely on his own. I’m glad he’s had a firsthand view not only of the tactics they used, but also heard my responses, questions, pushbacks, and refusals. I ended my first car dealership experience in tears at age 26 – thinking about it still makes me angry - and I want to equip my children with the tools to understand what they’re agreeing to, and to advocate for themselves.

[Accident Stock photos by Vecteezy]

11/15/2024

I just published a new blog on my website. The full text is below, but if you'd like to read my other blogs on a wide variety of personal finance topics, you can find those here: https://allisonbishop.com/blog

Teens and Money

I see a lot of people asking advice on how to help their children to transition to financial adulthood, particularly when they’re heading to college or otherwise leaving the nest. As a parent of four teenagers, this is something I’ve personally been navigating for the past few years. Here’s what we’ve done:

Bank accounts:
When they get a job, we open a checking account at our local bank. We’ve left their childhood savings accounts as is. They get a debit card with the checking account, and the bank imposes a $50 limit on debit card usage per day (that limit can be adjusted in the future). In my mind, the limit isn’t so much to control their spending, but it limits the risk if the debit card number gets stolen.

They’ve all been under 18 when opening the account, and so my name is on it with theirs. I plan to leave it that way until they’re out in the world with a full-time job. At the moment, it means I can easily transfer money back and forth between our accounts.

Their earnings get deposited into the checking account, and then as the balance grows we talk about moving money into savings. That account at the local bank gets barely any interest, but is adequate until they save several thousand dollars.

Once they have around $5k in the bank, we open a high-yield savings account. I opened one for my daughter at age 15, so it’s held as a custodial account under my name. My son was over 18 when he earned enough to make it worthwhile, so he did his own research and opened an account on his own.

Retirement:
For my older two, I’ve also had them open Roth IRAs shortly after they start working. For my daughter, I opened her a custodial Roth IRA at Vanguard. It requires $1,000 initial deposit. I wanted her to contribute $100 per month, but she felt like that was too much, so we settled on $50/month. It comes out of her checking account automatically every month. This is where you can see the miracle of compound interest – even if she does nothing else but add $50 per month for the rest of her working life, she will end up with about $300,000 in that account, and only 10% of that will have been money she contributed; the other 90% will be tax-free earnings. My son was over 18 when he had enough money to start a Roth, and so I suggested what he should do, but I don’t have access or control over that money.

Credit:
Building a credit history responsibly is important to me. We live in a world where credit scores can affect our lives in many ways, and I want my children to be successful and smart in making credit decisions. For my own convenience, I made my two older children authorized users on my credit card. They’re permitted to use it with my permission or for my benefit, such as picking up groceries for me, or filling my car with gas. My son uses it to book his own travel arrangements to come home from college on breaks. [Having him book his own travel is not only one item off my to-do list, but is another real step towards independence.] I purposely used a card where we all have different card numbers, and the statement shows our use by person, so I can quickly scan their purchases to make sure I’m on board. They’re also allowed to use it if they want to make a purchase and they’re over their daily limit on their debit card. Then they tell me how much they spent, and I transfer the money from their account to mine.

An unexpected benefit I found is that even though credit card companies often say that they won’t report credit card activity for authorized users on their credit report, that’s apparently not entirely true. My son had a 720 credit score as soon as I added him to that account, when he had no other credit history.

Lastly, that same son opened a Discover student credit card in his own name during his freshman year of college at my suggestion. The reason is primarily that he won’t be on my card forever, and so he will lose that long credit history he’s currently enjoying (I’ve had that card since before he was born!). I want him to have a credit card that he can hold onto for a long time, which will strengthen his credit score over time. I made it clear that he should use it for one recurring charge per month (I think he’s doing his NYT subscription) and he needs to set it up to autopay in full every single month.

Spending:
I don’t monitor or question my teens’ spending very closely. Part of my role is to allow them to learn how to use money, and that isn’t served by my micromanaging their decisions. I’d much rather have them make mistakes with their money at this point, when we’re talking about small dollars, rather than when they’re 25 and have the potential to make far larger mistakes. They all know I have access to see their paychecks and debit card activity, but I’ve never made a negative comment about how or where they’re choosing to spend their money.

We also talk about money regularly, even if it’s just a mention about how much more they earned the week they worked a lot more hours, or conversation about a purchase they’re planning to make. I can see them gaining confidence and skills around making money decisions, which provides me with more peace of mind as they’re spreading their wings.

If you have anything to add to this topic, please let me know! It’s something I think about often and love to talk about. I have another blog coming up soon about the real-world lessons my son observed through my car-buying process at the dealership. It was an invaluable experience for him.

[Photo by Fabian Blank on Unsplash]

10/16/2024

It's that time again! My friend and colleague, financial aid expert Bill Smith, will be presenting a free webinar on Monday, November 4 at 7 pm Eastern time about how financial aid and paying for college works these days. I've attended this presentation several times, and have gotten useful information every time.

This is primarily geared towards families with students in grades 10-12, but I first attended one of Bill's presentations when my oldest was in middle school and it wasn't too early. If college is in the future of you or a loved one, you can benefit.

You can register in advance, and will get a reminder e-mail on the day of the webinar: https://us02web.zoom.us/meeting/register/tZAqd-2pqT8qE9FY0HQeN8cBLMEkn7lNVf6Q #/registration

06/24/2024

02/04/2024

If you know anyone who would love to attend one (or four) workshops about being intentional with your money, I'm presenting a series at SerenityMe on Tuesday evenings in March and April. Register for any of the workshops individually or get a discount for the full series. Snacks provided by Empeople Credit Union

5:30-7:00pm $100 per person or $30 per workshop Join us for a series of talks, sponsored by Empeople Credit Union, around financial wellness and being intentional with your money. Starting in March, Allison Bishop, financial coach, will be leading a four-week series of Mindful Money workshops, which...

09/15/2023

I'm so excited to be speaking at the Maine Women's Conference next month! Join us at Holiday Inn by the Bay in Portland if you're free on October 25. Tickets available here: https://www.themainewomensconference.org/

Next in our epic speaker lineup is Allison Bishop!

Allison Bishop is a financial coach in Portland with more than twenty-five years of experience as a CPA. She started her financial coaching business eight years ago when she recognized a lack of resources to help people make wise financial decisions. She helps her clients to identify and prioritize their financial goals and then come up with a realistic plan to make progress toward those goals.

Learn more about her session here: https://bit.ly/44OHNuo

03/21/2023

New blog up - this one is on a serious topic: imbalance of power in a couple's finances and the possibility of financial abuse. Full text is below (although it's easier to read on the website).

You can find my other blogs on my website at https://allisonbishop.com/blog

Digging into an Imbalance of Power in Relationship Finances

I usually write about somewhat lighter topics – a podcast review or a blog about how to combine finances with a partner. Today I want to talk about a subject that alarms me, and I see it with some regularity: an imbalance of power regarding finances. I’m looking at this as it relates to married couples or long-term partners who share finances.

It’s fine if one partner is the primary financial person in the household – paying the bills and possibly making most of the investment decisions. Sometimes it falls much more in one partner’s skillset and interests than the other person. However, both partners should have a voice in how the money is spent, saved, donated, or invested. Each has a responsibility to have a basic understanding of the assets, debts, income, and expenses.

Here are some examples of the types of items that I think both people should have some idea about:
• The balances and monthly payments on any debts. You don’t need to be able to tell me your mortgage balance down to the penny off the top of your head, but you should have some idea what it is, and you should be able to look it up relatively quickly and easily.
• Which banks or investment firms are holding your money and roughly how much is in the accounts. Is your 401(k) balance $10,000 or $500,000? What about your spouse’s?
• How much money is coming into your household every month.
• Are you saving and/or investing every month? How much and into what accounts?
• How much did you spend on your vehicles? How did you pay for them – savings or loans?

To clarify, I think it’s okay for each party to have a level of privacy around some money. For example, you might both contribute to a joint account for the household expenses proportionally to each of your incomes, and each maintain a separate account that you can spend at your pleasure and don’t have to account for to the other person. That’s a healthy system if it’s jointly agreed to, and it doesn’t worry me at all if that’s what you’ve decided works for you.

However, both parties should have a sense of all investments, regardless of whose name they’re in. Retirement accounts can only have one person’s name on them, but they’re being built for the future financial health of the couple, and the balances should be available to both parties. I was a stay-at-home mom for a while, and so all of our retirement savings was done through my husband’s employer retirement plan. That doesn’t mean it’s all his money and I have none from that time period.

But what if we're not talking about a healthy balance of decision-making? If all of the financial decisions are dominated by one person, the culprit is likely one of two things:
(a) the passive party is intentionally putting their head in the sand and not stepping up to shoulder their share of the financial decisions, or
(b) the decision maker is controlling the information to the other party, which is a form of financial abuse

The ostrich
If you are a person who has eagerly abdicated all financial decisions to your spouse, consider your reasons for that. Does the thought of money make you so anxious that you avoid it at all costs? Talk to your partner. Ask them how the arrangement is working for them, and find out whether your relinquishing of all responsibility is negatively affecting them. You are leaving them to shoulder the whole burden themselves, without a real partner to lean on.

I’ve seen marriages where one party is deeply immersed in the daily money management and is keenly aware of mounting debt, while the other person is blissfully ignorant and is then treated to a shock when they have to face reality. It’s not fair to either party, and regular and honest communication is the only real solution. If the thought of open conversations about money is stressful to you or causes a lot of anxiety, this is an area where therapy might help.

If you need more motivation beyond being a good partner, consider what you would do if your spouse or partner got sick or died. How would you access your accounts and make sure the bills are paid? Do you know where the passwords are kept? Would you know where to look to track down your investments or retirement accounts? If your spouse has a will or life insurance, do you know where you’d go to access those important documents?

Financial abuse
Option b, financial abuse, is very real, very common, and deeply alarming. Here are some frequent signs of financial abuse:
• Your partner controls all of the accounts and won’t allow you access to them.
• Your partner gets defensive or angry when you ask basic questions about your joint finances.
• If your signature is required to file a tax return or get a loan, your partner doesn’t show you all the related documents – you’re only allowed to see the signature page.
• You’re asked to sign forms that you know contain fraudulent information.
• You are discouraged from working or having your own money, or the other person controls your paycheck from the moment it is deposited.
• Your partner refuses to tell you how much they earn.
• Your spending is scrutinized and criticized.

If these red flags sound familiar to you, please take a step back and consider what might be going on. Financial abuse keeps many spouses from leaving their partners because they’re afraid they won’t be able to support themselves and their children, but there are resources and legal protections for people who have been subjected to financial abuse.

Consider who in your life might be knowledgeable about professionals or resources that might help. Your local bank teller might have had training on financial abuse, or might be able to direct you to someone who has. If you’ve been hiding your spouse’s misconduct from your family, consider reaching out to them. If you’re concerned that your partner is looking at your internet browser history, head to the public library and search for resources on the public computers there. Search for “IRS Innocent Spouse Relief” if you’re worried that you signed a fraudulent tax return (or someone signed on your behalf). Your state may have laws on the books which provide relief for someone who was subjected to financial abuse. Search your state’s name and the term “financial abuse” or “economic abuse.” Contact your local domestic violence organization and find out if they have information or resources. The two articles below are a good place to start.
https://dfpi.ca.gov/2022/10/04/financial-abuse-is-domestic-abuse/
https://nnedv.org/content/about-financial-abuse/

You’re also welcome to contact me, and I will give you the best advice I can, free of charge. You are not alone.

[Photo by Firmbee.com on Unsplash]

My mission is to assist my clients in aligning their financial decisions with their values and to pr